So You Are New To Dating?

It has been my experience that “Baby Gays” love me. What is the definition of a baby gay one may ask, well a baby gay is any gay between the ages of 21 and 25 or a gay man who has recently come out of the closet. You may ask why this is so. Well men have a maturation curve, the gay life offers a lot of different options and it takes a few years of exploration to figure out exactly what all of the different options are, what one wants to explore and finally they type of gay man that one wants to be. The learning never stops but there comes a point when you look in the mirror and you know exactly where you are heading in regards to the type of individual you intend to be.

Being a fan among Baby Gays, has given me an edge on dating advice I have a never ending pool to experiment with, add the fact that I have done my fair share of dating, that my friends all come to me for dating advice and one can clearly see why I have a dating blog.

Recently I have found myself giving my mother dating advice. It is odd considering that the only reason I can give her good advice is because I am a man who dates men, something she and I have decided not to discuss, ever. My mother has recently found herself single. Divorced from my stepfather and when the guy she was recently dating began to act like an asshole she walked away from that too. I find it really hard dishing out tough love to my mother. She is a bit more sensitive than my other friends and she turns to G-d for everything. I can give great advice to my mother but it is not until she prays on it or the shit hits the fan that she takes it and I am typically left without the credit, not that I mind.  

The other night she called to talk about her boyfriend and I was not in the mood to hear the same thing for the 100edth time. Typically I try not to tell my friends to break up but rather talk to the person, my mother’s response is always, “I will just pray about it and let G-d deal with it.” I typically want to respond, “Then why the hell are we talking about it? Why are you all hurt, either get over it or deal with it?”

That night I wanted to tell here to stop being hurt and look at the type of men she keeps dating. Twice now she has dated men who never been in a serious relationship and are in their late 40s. Last I checked that is a huge red flag.

So I have some general advice for older women who are looking to settle down with mister Right.

1. Date men who you have a common dating history with.
2. The moment his actions do not line up with his words, Talk or walk.
3. Be sure to discuss intentions, if he cannot be honest with where he expects things to go, then you will most likely end up wasting your time. 
4. Be sure that you have more than one thing in common. You need to be able to have a conversation that is more than just your day, your past, and what you plan on having for diner.
5. Take note of your dating pattern and adjust, if things keep failing, it’s not them it’s you.
6. Have realistic intentions, do not think you are going to start a family and your biological clock has stopped.
7. If your religion is important to you than date a man who ACTS like it is important to him as well.
8. Be mindful of rumors, gossip always stems from truth.
9. Shop around do not seem too desperate, be sure you have explored your options. 
10. Do not allow things to progress to fast.
11. Be honest to yourself and others.
12. Like for like, do not expect a man without kids to relate or understand your problems related to you being a parent.
13.  Men like working for it, so play hard to get and keep an obvious amount of distance, In the beginning. 

These dating rules work for anyone who is rejoining the world of dating. Whether you are a Baby Gay or an older woman stick to the rules and don’t go diving in the deep end.