I do not think anyone understood or could even fathom how bad a shape my life has gotten to be. Vixc B was always the one who had it together or at least could make it look like he had it together. I was one who always had a job, I had a car, and I always had enough money to go out even when I was broke. My friends loved to be around me because I always had good advice when needed and I could sit down and really talk with them. Then it seemed like once it all started coming together, it went to shit.
I lost my car, my job, the means to go back to school and the place I was living was miles away from my friends. To top it all off, my mother was not coming around to the idea of having a gay son; she went as far as to force me to pretend that I was not gay whenever she was around. I went with it I am a survivor. Then my sister hit 21 my cousin became a father and we lost our grandmother to cancer. To the rest of my family it was not that much of a shock but to me I was completely blindsided. My mother never told me much all I knew, she was in the hospital for dehydration.
Before I knew it, things were happening fast, Panera was no longer my place of employment and my love of crafts and cooking led to perusing a career in baking. I needed money, mom was not helping, and financial aid was only giving me about a quarter of what I needed. I was hoping for a scholarship that I did not get and then a fight with my mother left me not talking to her side of the family. I then found out she told the police I punched her in the face. I was devastated, she lied on me.
I began looking at where I was in life. No car, suspended license, I owed money for tickets, I had no money for school, no job and I might be going to jail. I just wanted to get an education and have a bakery café. I spoke with my aunt and she confirmed there was no warrant for my arrest. I then found out that I only had to pay off the tickets I already started paying to get my driver license back. I then felt like a fool because Middlesex community had a both Pastry arts and culinary arts programs that I could afford. I found the information to all my accounts and got them in order and my 401K is still growing although I am not adding to it.
My external hard drive was on the fritz and today it worked after I tried everything. My life was now organized both digitally and all my paperwork. My house is almost all clean and it’s only Thursday. I do not know if it is safe to breathe yet, but here goes nothing.
